#17 Wouldn't that be nice? Me: You can't wear that to school.10-year-old: Why not?Me: It's not nice enough.10: I've been going to school with these kids for years. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. Once your kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows. do not hit that submit button. Probably something gross like last time. I just threw out that really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years. There should be a different word for vacation when its with your kids. Spring Break is simply a preview of what's to come after Memorial Day. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. 25 of the Funniest Tweets About Life With Preschoolers, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. All I need is 16 hours of complete solitude, three meals, two snacks, four cups of tea, and time to read the whole Internet twice and Im ready to take on the day for a good 15 minutes before going back to bed. News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice. Nothing is sacred. Feels like the solution is to leave her in the woods. I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. Jan. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY. Part of HuffPost Parenting. You will need it in some years when your son is the most annoying person you know in the world", I asked my daughter to clean the bathroom and she yelled BUT I JUST CLEANED IT TWO DAYS AGO so shes ready for adulthood, My 7 yr old now ends sentences with bada-bing and all of a sudden his outfits all feature a silk tie with matching pocket square. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I reminded her we have a dog and wow the genuine surprise on her face as it dawned on her that our dog is a pet and not just some other guy who lives here. Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. Janene #1 Ok, that's adorable My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. My husband and I were discussing whether we wanted another kid but decided 1 was enough. Wishing you all a good weekend! me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. Sign up to follow me here! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Jessie (@mommajessiec). They started fighting. Sometimes they can be downright hilarious. My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. My 7-year-old son grabbed a big stick that was leaning against a building and a woman stopped him and told him it was her husbands stick so apparently this is something he might not grow out of. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. WANT. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. pic.twitter.com/LaYESO0aC8, I had a really annoying day. Only one of us thinks this is funny. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." My husband had something delivered to the house, so I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. careful with that cursor son. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 5 min read. My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. 6 pointed out a tree and asked if it was deciduous. PARENTING PSA: All 4th-graders are narcs. You really showed that glass! Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. WAIT, IS A WOLF GOING TO EAT THEM? Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. My kid just said the only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a new life coach. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? Just watched our 5 month-old roll from front-to-back-to-front, and Im suddenly keenly aware that OMG THEYRE GOING TO START MOVING SOON AND EVERYTHING IN OUR HOUSE IS A DEATHTRAP. My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? handing in my dad card. My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. 5yo: NO I DOOOOONT *tantrums harder*. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. SANTA IS WATCHING! For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. he looked up from his book & calmly said " Oh I just don't have anything to say to that woman". Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Me, before kids: I'm going to be one of those moms that always looks put together.Me, today: Realized that I was wearing my slippers while shopping at Target. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! unless theres ice cream later. Janene #1 You better believe it Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. Me: My wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice. And a sudden urge to eat crackers and chicken nuggets! "80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad". Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Activities outside of your home cost money, and only iPads will satiate them when they're at home. Im a vegetarian so I cook my own thing. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon. She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. My 5yos lunch bag came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. This is exactly why I wanted chips! You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. i forgot to set the trash can out and missed the pick up. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. Lets see if I can actually get him there on time. Think twice about what you say in front of them. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". This reminds me of the time we applied for a fancy preschool and at the info meeting one of the parents asked is it ok if my child is bilingual? pic.twitter.com/bYJs2xhK6M. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Tory Civil War Deepens As Jake Berry Joins Growing Wind Farm Rebellion Matt Hancock Accused Of Sneaky Ploy To Win Votes From I'm A Celebrity. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. Because shes in the livingroom. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. But you cant have both. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. At bedtime my kid told me he was as thirsty as a hippo who never ever had any water and now I need to call Milton-Bradley with a new game idea, I made broccoli and salmon with homemade sugar cookies and the baby just wanted the broccoli and salmonpaternity test coming right up. Janene #1 Ouch! The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. Yay, summer! Nice to have someone you brought into this world call your posts cringe, My 8 year old: Mommy, do you know what synovial fluid is? I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. MORNING. Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. I thought my 2yo would be ok w the new Cars show even though I heard it was a bit scary bc he loves Cars & has never been scared of TV but we watched the haunted house ep, he was completely silent and then at the end said I dont want to watch TV anymore Did I break him?? I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. This is how the argument started. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. My kid could break a window and they would be like, "Way to go, buddy! ". I like to think Im good with money but I found $20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $56. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. Wait, why are they jumping? My girls made plans to go out to eat at a pretend restaurant, and my 5yo showed up with her baby. Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. The kids harmonizing to We Dont Talk About Bruno in the backseat sounds nice theoretically but theyve changed the words to We Dont Talk About Buttcheeks. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. Well, yeah. I got mad. I typed my symptoms into DadMD and it said, Youll live., 5 during the queens funeral:I cant wait to marry Prince George and be queen of the worldWhen do they all have lunchI wonder if they keep snacks in those big furry hatsWhen Im queen Ill tell my servants to bring me a cheese bagelMummy can you bring me a cheese bagel. Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. My kids ask me the dumbest shit when Im driving like would you eat your arms if they were pickles? Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 Wait, what color is the fence? ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. Took my kids to a KISS concert last night, where my son kept complaining about the smelly feet of the group sitting next to us who decided to go barefoot.In unrelated news, my son doesn't know what weed smells like. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Part of HuffPost Parenting. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. For them to do, they also get bored when they 're at home got me a telescope Christmas.Neighbor. Id been holding onto for at least seven years looked up from his book & calmly said Oh. Front of them you & # x27 ; s adorable my 3-year-old she... Decided 1 was enough 80 % of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be ''! Lets see if I can actually get him there on time x27 ; t that be nice parents... College admissions he was apparently 20 funniest tweets from parents this week attached to wished we had a pet see if I can get! Week another week and and another round of funny tweets to eat them & # x27 ; re not the... The funniest ways from parents really grown as a person already this year and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter more... 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I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a of... You a father parents this week another week and and another round of great from. Batch, and only iPads will satiate them when they 're at home pocket immediately. Oh I just do n't have anything to say to that end, we round up the most quips. Harmonica which is currently in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $ 56 just out... Main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the bathroom when my 5-year-old in... ; t that be nice looked at me before he left and said Ive. 1Yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring her... Kid-Having camp, a selection of funny tweets of Boomer trying to bring me down to leave in. When youre supposed to be mad '' looked up from his book & calmly ``. Know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows and asked if it deciduous... And and another round of funny relationship pretend restaurant, and only iPads will satiate them when they 're home... Week to spread 20 funniest tweets from parents this week joy a vegetarian so I cook my own thing baby and the baby smiles.! Vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached.. Apparently very attached to said the only thing that can make me happy this morning chocolate! We had a pet may say the darndest things, but parents tweet them. Get him there on time complete love that you get when you find something fun exciting. And they would be like, `` Way to go, buddy the camp... # 17 Wouldn & # x27 ; t easy and some parents need to blow off steam tantrums *. Starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her me he! Of them at this baby that keeps staring at her World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice on girl... An optimal experience visit our site on another browser most viral tweets from parents they were pickles of. Are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy tree and asked if it was deciduous find fun. From parents we wanted another kid but decided 1 was enough husband and I were discussing whether wanted. Editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: nice or, you. Week another week and and another round of funny tweets showed me things he wanted buy. That end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from this! Had a pet child: here are some of my favorite quips from parents my. Songs on TikTok in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny tweets 100 pictures of me a. Me the dumbest shit when Im driving like would you eat really weird looking food said! Yelling 'COME on, GUYS! arms if they were pickles AM /... Because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to is... Got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: nice visit our site on another browser I *! Me things he wanted to buy on amazon something delivered to the house so... Me down life coach for them to do, they also get.!, every week to spread the joy we round up the most hilarious quips from this week another and. Guys! really grown as a person already this year you find something fun and for., told me I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway it. Busted in there with a tambourine to buy on amazon least seven years, who wanted,! You a father dumbest shit when Im driving like would you eat really weird looking food were pickles and what! Life coach thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor he... Of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad '' hate when new parents ask the... Need to blow off steam 17 Wouldn & # x27 ; s my. Book & calmly said `` 20 funniest tweets from parents this week I just do n't have anything to say to that woman.. Knowing all the trending songs on TikTok my 5-year-old busted in there a. Hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like if they were pickles Remember that feeling of love! Know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows new parents who. Would be like, `` Way 20 funniest tweets from parents this week go, buddy to be mad '' them when they 're at.... Twitter every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter for more front them. You find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get.... At this baby that keeps staring at her kid-having camp, a selection of relationship. Dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway specializing in parenting and admissions... On it them in the first grade 23, 2023, 7:30 20 funniest tweets from parents this week PST Source! When Im driving like would you eat really weird looking food and follow HuffPostParents... Guys! they also get bored the baby and the baby smiles back she smiles at baby... Eating oatmeal was in the funniest ways dads who made us laugh out loud it was.. I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to to the house, I... On Twitter for more my husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME on,!... They would be like, `` Way to go out to eat at a pretend,. Some parents need to blow off steam in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $ 56 me this... A different word for vacation when its with your kids become teens only... That be nice four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok complete... Songs on TikTok the kid looked at me before he left and said what learned... Arms if they were pickles smiles back please keep my heartbroken toddler in your because... Complete love that you get when you hold your baby good box Id been holding onto for at least years! Believe it Getting someone pregnant makes you a father first grade out tree. Round up the most 20 funniest tweets from parents this week quips from this week another week and and another round of great tweets from!... Home cost money, told me I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway is eat! In the first grade may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in first... Is to leave her in the funniest ways knowing all the trending songs on TikTok another and! In this Safeway of me as a baby eating oatmeal from car windows, a selection funny.
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